


Grocery List

by bethesdad



Category: Dream Daddy: A Dad Dating Simulator
Genre: Comfort, Domestic, Fluff, M/M, Sexual Frustration, Teasing, Undecided Relationship(s)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-10
Updated: 2017-08-10
Packaged: 2018-12-13 19:31:59
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 11,459
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11766840
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bethesdad/pseuds/bethesdad
Summary: Yet another Craig/Remi fic, yeehaw. So!!! With this one in particular, I want to continue it and add more chapters. There's tidbits of possible story arcs that I mentioned throughout the fic. If it's something you'd wanna see more of, please tell me! // Craig needs to learn to relax and let somebody else do his dad chores. Remi's his man.





	Grocery List

Two years had gone by since Remi and Craig wandered out into the forest together and came to realize how grossly in love with one another they were, and still… Two years later… They were equally affectionate about each other. Perhaps more so, even. Of course, things had settled down considerably and they had entered the calm domesticity stage of their relationship, but regardless their flame still burned bright. Remi had been living with Craig for quite a while, nearly three quarters of their time together, and seemed to feel perfectly at home with his step-kids and loving boyfriend. Everything nowadays just felt… Right. No more wondering if he was headed in the right direction, no more insecurity every morning and every night about whether or not he was making good choices. He knew what he was doing, he knew where he belonged, and good lord that was one of the most comforting feelings in the universe. He, quite frankly, had Craig and the kids to thank for that. Amanda included. Without them, he’d have no distinguishable path in life. 

 

Mooshy feelings and daydream-esque romance stories aside, Remi and Craig were leading a stable, healthy relationship. They had their arguments, even a few nasty fights, but things balanced out in the end and they always came back together as a team. They knew when to give each other space, when to come in closer, when to support one another and how to do so-- It was all too goddamn good to be true. Sometimes Remi got this thought in his head… Hey, it’d been two years already, him and Craig were the most solid relationship he’d had other than Amanda’s dad, maybe it was time to… Y’know…- Ah. Never mind. That was such a hard thing for Remi to think about. He knew one day it’d become relevant, but maybe today wasn’t that day. 

 

Speaking of what today was, it actually was- well, nothing in particular. It was a Saturday morning and Remi was basking on the couch while Craig was busy doing yoga in the center of the living room. The kids were at Smashley’s for the weekend, so both of them decided to take advantage of the situation and lounge around the house in their underwear. Ah, that’s what true freedom is, borderline nudity when your kids aren’t around. Other than the sense of temporary freedom, watching Craig do all his fancy stretches and poses in nothin’ but his skivvies was a real treat. The TV was on, and was even tuned in to Remi’s favorite show, but he just couldn’t seem to take his eyes off his lover. His favorite thing was when Craig was all face-down, ass-up. Downward dog or something like that. Name aside, it was just stunning to watch. 

 

After a solid twenty minutes of watching Craig contort his body into all sorts of weird shapes, Remi found that he just couldn’t help himself. Being a one-man audience to this fantastic show was just too much, he had to show some sort of appreciation for Craig’s hard work; a man with talent like that should never go unrecognized. Remi had to think of a show of affection other than throwing money at him, because that would just be brutish. He brought his fingers up to his mouth and did a loud cat-call whistle instead- a true classic. Craig was caught off guard at the sound, and peeked over at Remi. He was currently standing, bent over to reach his toes, and stared at Remi through his legs. 

 

Craig’s eyes were wide and his brows were raised high. He looked so surprise, and Remi was a little confused why. You’d think after two years he’d start to expect these sorts of things from Remi. “Dude…” Craig spoke up, “Did you just try to cat-call me? In my own living room? While you are literally five feet away from me?” 

 

With a roll of his eyes, Remi adjusted his position on the couch so that he was lying on his side, half-propped up on his elbows. “No, not at all. I was whistling to try and get my trusty carrier pigeon’s attention. I’m going to send a letter to Damien, because I’ve been having a secret affair with him for years,” he let out a clearly dramatized sigh, “I thought it was time you finally found out.” 

 

Craig got out of his pose and stood up straight, turning to face Remi and setting his hands on his hips. He shot Remi a smirk, but at the same time had one brow quirked at him. “Pssh. Do you remember the first time we went to the gym together when you first moved back here?” He asked with an assertive tone of voice, clearly assuming his alpha-male archetype. 

 

Why was he asking about that, though? Remi was admittedly confused, but he’d play along.. “Uh… Yeah, sorta… Why?” 

 

“Well, I remember we were talking about why people went to the gym and exercised in all the super intense ways they do, and, like… I remember you said- and I quote- “They’re doing this  to crush the skulls of their enemies,” and I just wanna remind you of that right now.” Remi’s brows were so low they were causing his eyes to squint, and Craig could tell the cogs in his brain were turning so hard he was gonna blow a gasket soon. He really wasn’t piecing things together just yet. 

 

“And..”

 

“And so, I'm reminding you because you know how hard I exercise day in and day out. You know the lengths I go to so I can be this strong. You know I work just as hard as those guys who you said can crush skulls, so… Before you cat-call me again, just remember that if you do..” he lifted a hand and pointed a stern finger at Remi. “I'll take your head, put it between my legs, and pop it like a water balloon.” Although Craig’s voice was deeper and more booming than it usually was, Remi could still tell by the look in how eyes and the way his lips so desperately wanted to perk into a smile that he was joking. Craig rarely made an attempt at such a dark sense of humor, but… it seemed perhaps Remi was starting to rub off on him.

 

Remi formed a smirk on his face and changed his position to what the kids called a “draw me like one of your French girls” position. From what Remi remembered, that was a meme a few years back. See? He was getting a hang of the whole Hip Dad thing. “Ooh, crush my skull with your strong thighs daddy,” he purred with the most obnoxious, exaggerated voice he could muster. He glanced over at Craig, expecting a reaction, but Craig just stood still. He had his lip held tightly between his teeth, arms placed back on his hips. There was… a particularly awkward several moments of silence.

 

When that uncomfortable wave of quiet finally broke, it was shattered by the sound of Craig’s delightful laugh as he buckled over and put his hands on his knees. His laugh was loud, energetic, and best of all infectious. Apparently something about calling him daddy and telling him to squeeze his brains out really tickled him. Craig was laughing to the point of struggling to breathe, and that made Remi erupt into a loud chuckle with him. Within moments, they were both nothing but giggling messes. 

 

Losing his balance from his giggles, Craig wobbled his way over to the couch and dropped himself down beside Remi’s feet. Which… gave him a solid foot of space on the couch considering how tall Remi was. Being aware of his boyfriend being secluded to the end of the couch, and also being acutely aware of how he was close to him and yet not close enough, Remi sat up and grabbed Craig around his waist, pulling the man down on top of him. Craig snorted like an over-excited child and finally started to calm his breathing. Remi was hoping holding his darling to his chest would chill him out, and it seemed he was successful. Craig nestled his face into Remi’s chest and sighed.

 

“Bro… I don't even know why that was so funny,” he spoke against Remi’s skin, and he could feel Craig’s warm breath cascade against the expanse of his chest. That sensation was so deeply comforting, and set a gentle reminder in Remi’s head that Craig was like home to him. “I guess I wasn't expecting you to say that. And, like, I was already trying really hard not to laugh. That just sorta pushed me over the edge.”

 

Remi leaned down to kiss Craig on the top of his head. “You never know what to expect from the mysterious Remi Garza. I'm unpredictable,” he spoke with gallons of exaggeration and boastfulness in his voice. He heard Craig scoff and he himself huffed as Craig’s hand came up and gave him a firm pat on the cheek.

 

“Shut up,” he giggled softly. “...If you're the mysterious one, am I the detective or am I your trusty yet naive partner in crime?” He asked playfully, moving his head so that his chin was resting on Remi’s chest and he could look at him with big ol’ puppy eyes. 

 

Bringing one hand up to stroke his beard thoughtfully, Remi milled over Craig’s question in his head as if it was genuine and serious. “Huh… I think you're the detective. Always trying to figure out my next move, trying your hardest to be the best you can be. In your heart you know you're good at your job, but sometimes you can't help but feel like you never do enough. You never accept that you can't save everyone, and on top of that you never accept that you'll never catch me. One day, all that pressure you put on yourself is gonna catch up to you, and you’re gonna burn out. You’ll end up resigning, and then I’ll finally reveal myself to you because you no longer have loyalty to the police. Then… We move to the Caribbean with all my stolen money and live on the beaches. We drink many margaritas and make a lot of love.”

 

Craig looked at him blankly, giving him a slow blink as that little story processed in his head. “Dude.. that's deep,” was all he responded with. “I think the ending was my favorite part, though.”

 

“Was it because of the margaritas or the love making?” Remi asked with a bright grin, at which Craig did nothing but stifle another laugh. God, these two just made each other so happy it was unreal. After that last awful joke followed by pleasant laughter, the two of them let out sighs almost in tandem and relaxed in one another’s embrace. Craig laid lazily on Remi’s chest, and below him his larger partner leaned his head back against the arm of the couch and closed his eyes. Craig was so.. Warm…  And comforting... And the feeling of his chest moving in and out at a steady pace was as peaceful as watching the tide roll in and out on a calm day. Man, everything about Craig just made Remi wanna either raw him or nap with him. Now, how did all of that calming stuff make Remi think of railing his fine ass? Who knows. Way too many things in this world made Remi wanna fuck. 

 

Right now, though, Remi was much more interested in the napping option. So, with his eyelids gently closed, he started to breathe in and out nice and slow. He focused on the sound of Craig breathing and the feeling of his body twitching against him every so often, like a puppy dreaming in his sleep, and eventually his mind started to drift away into some blissful state of--

 

“Babe…” No, Craig, no, go back to being sleepy and quiet. Don’t speak. “I gotta get up. I have stuff to do. Like, so much stuff.” But- aw, come on, dude. Just lay on the couch for a little longer, will you? Remi was sure it couldn’t really hurt anything to blow off his chores for a few more hours. In fact, he knew for certain it wasn’t, it was just that Craig was so obsessive and punctual that he had to get all of his chores done in a timely manner. Remi knew without a doubt that was his crippling sense of toxic perfectionism acting up. Craig was still a work in progress, he had to remind himself. He’d been taking steps in the right direction, but they were small. 

 

Groaning softly, Remi ran one of his hands through Craig’s hair. “Has it even been like an hour yet? Can’t you stay here just a tiny bit longer?” He grumbled.

 

Craig squinted his eyes and let out a long sigh from his nose. “No, I don’t think it has, but… I dunno, dude. Sitting here is nice and all, and you know I love cuddling with you, but I just. I just can’t stop thinking about all the shit I have to do,” he huffed and rubbed his face with one hand, as if tired. “It makes it hard to really enjoy being with you, you know? I wanna just think about you, but the only thing in my head is chores. My brain tells me that I gotta get all my ducks in a row before I can sit back and enjoy anything,” Craig explained, tightening up his posture and becoming tense up against Remi. Man, that stung like a bitch. Remi knew it wasn’t his fault, and this was one of Craig’s internal demons, but it still hurt. He wanted the best things in life for Craig, and he wanted to see him be able to really enjoy life. 

 

“Honey… I think you should stay here for a while longer. Maybe if you fell asleep, that’d help get things off your-"

 

“That won’t work, bro,” Craig stopped him with an awfully pessimistic taste in his mouth. “I’m not gonna be able to fall asleep with all this stuff in my head. I’ll just lay here and… think.” 

 

Alright, well… Considering that, Remi had to come up with a new solution. He had to think of something else that would keep Craig occupied and keep him from overworking himself, like he always did. He, ultimately, just wanted to find some way to keep Craig home for the day. Give him an actual day to relax, not a day at home where he sits and thinks about all the shit he isn’t doing. Sure, Craig actually did have stuff he had to get done, but there had to be a way around that. No, there was not a compromise, either- Remi was a stubborn mule and he’d made his decision. Craig was gonna relax, goddamit. “Why don’t… Why don’t I go do all your errands?” He suggested to Craig, all the while his fingers were still sifting through Craig’s soft hair. By Craig’s silence, and the tightness in his muscles, he was getting the idea that Craig was considering his suggestion, but… It wasn’t looking favorable for Remi. Before Craig got the chance to speak, Remi made his voice heard again. “I mean, c’mon. You trust me, don’t you? I can get done all the stuff you would. No problem. If ol’ Craiggory can handle it, so can I. We’re equals, bro.”

 

He felt a weight lift off his chest when he heard Craig scoff as he tried to bite back a chuckle. “...Did you seriously just call me  _ Craiggory? _ ” 

 

“Yes, but I don’t think that’s the point right now,” Remi replied with a grin on his cheeks. He couldn’t see it, but he could feel somewhere deep down that Craig had just rolled his eyes at him. “...My point is that you need to give yourself an actual day off for once. Not a day where you do just half of your chores, or where you do none of them but you make yourself upset thinking about all the stuff you didn’t do. Today, you’re gonna legitimately sit on your ass and watch TV while you eat ice-cream. And you know how you’re gonna accomplish that?” He paused, perhaps just to add dramatic effect. “You’re gonna know in the back of your head that all your errands are still getting run. By me. Your loving boyfriend, who is perfectly capable of doing all the mundane chores you do.” 

 

A sigh left Craig’s mouth and Remi felt his muscles relax and soften like ice melting. Craig slumped down against his body, staying silent for nearly two- maybe three- minutes. He was entirely still despite being more relaxed, and suffice to say, that was anxiety-evoking. The longer the silence went on, the tighter the knot in Remi’s knot became. Remi figured he knew how Joseph tied those complicated boat knots now, considering that’s what his guts were twisted up into. “Remi, I just…” The pins and needles stabbing Remi’s nerves pushed in deeper. “It’s hard, dude. I’m not used to having someone support like you do, all I’m used to is pulling my own weight and being my own help. And like- don’t get me wrong- no matter what, I can always support myself, I’m not dependant or any of that shit, but…” He sighed and shook his head, “You have a good point. Sooner or later I gotta loosen up. Being wound this tight starts to hurt after a while, anyway.” It looked like it stung Craig to be admitting this stuff, even though Remi already knew what he was telling him.

 

“So… You’ll let me-”

 

“Yeah, yeah I’ll let you take all my responsibilities for the day. It’s not much, really, cause after all it is a Saturday, but like… It’s still stuff that needs to get done.” Craig scoffed disapprovingly at himself, “Jesus. Why am I even so worried about like, two or three errands to run?” 

 

Remi made a soft “hm” sound from under him. “Habit?” He suggested with a shrug. “It’s just how you’ve always been. You take your expectations of yourself really seriously, and like… On one hand, that’s cool, means you’ve got good self discipline and determination, but it also makes you. Well. Y’know. Do that thing you do.” Craig let out a quiet grumble and Remi could tell he wasn’t into the vagueness. “The obsessing. That thing.” He didn’t particularly want to say it aloud, because quite frankly it sounded bad. It made Craig sound more problematic than he really was. Remi never wanted to point out Craig’s…. Flaws. He knew he had them, as every person in the world had problems, but still it felt like a punch to the gut to put Craig’s issues out there in the air. He had this deep, dark fear that Craig would beat himself up over his flaws and entertain that idea that he’s less deserving than all those around him. 

 

Craig crossed his arms over his chest and let out a long exhale. “You know, dude… You’re right,” he admitted. He was glad Craig was seeing things the way he was. “I don’t really wanna get too much deeper into this topic, though. Can we just end this on the note that you’re gonna promise you’ll get my stuff done?” There was a pause, as if Craig was allowing Remi time to speak, and his partner did part his lips to allow words to enter the air, but-- “And then you come home and we can do this again. Maybe in the bed, though, cause the couch is a little small for the two of us.” Well, Remi was already enthusiastic to provide for Craig, but that made the deal a whole lot sweeter. 

 

With a soft, compassionate smile, Remi moved his hand out of Craig’s hair and leaned forward to kiss the top of his head. “Sounds like somethin’ I can agree to, honey.”

 

“Cool,” Craig responded before rolling himself off of Remi’s chest and hitting his feet to the floor with a soft thud. Before thinking through his actions, Remi made an audible grumble and shot Craig a particularly distasteful glare. Solely for getting up off the couch, yes. Craig stood up straight and placed both hands on the small of his back, lean arching backward and groaning as his spine made a plethora of small cracking sounds. He sighed and looked back at Remi. “You should get going now, then. Don’t wanna waste the day and end up rushing, y’know?”  

 

Remi loud out an exaggerated groan and rolled himself off the couch, hitting the floor with the full force of his body. In the moment, that seemed like a good idea to imply just how much he wanted five more minutes, but now that he was sore- on the floor-... He really regretted his decision. He’d landed on his side, and good God his shoulder hurt from the impact. It was easy to tell that he was getting old now that falling of a couch took that much out of him. He let out a low groan from the floor, which got even louder when he heard Craig giggling under his breath. Remi stayed on the scratchy carpet for another thirty seconds or so before, with a roll of his eyes, Craig finally reached down and grabbed Remi by his bicep. He took that as a cue to start standing up, and allowed Craig to help him. Maybe the only reason he didn’t get up earlier was because he was waiting for Craig’s help. Once he was back on his feet, he wobbled back and forth and Craig’s immediate reaction was to put his hands on Remi’s hips to steady him. Didn’t want him hitting the floor a second time, now did we? 

 

Now facing each other head-on, however still confronting their tragic six-inch height difference, Remi couldn’t help but feel his cheeks get hot. For a moment, they got caught in each other’s eyes- getting utterly lost. Craig was admiring the starstruck look on Remi’s face, the appreciation for him doing something as simply and yet caring as keeping him from falling. Remi, on the other hand, was basking in the harmonious feeling that radiated off of Craig’s face, and swirled around in his eyes like ink in water. Like… Yes, he realized what Craig just did was nothing more than him being a decent person, but Remi could tell from the little sparkle in his eyes that Craig just. Just. Just fucking cared so goddamn much. That blew his mind sometimes- what in the world made  _ Craig Cahn _ care about someone like Remi so much?

 

“...Thanks, babe,” Remi finally spoke up in a soft murmur. In response, a bright smile perked on Craig’s cheeks and caused his eyes to squint closed. God, it was so cute when he did that. Everything about Craig just seemed to feel like sunshine warming his skin, or like a blanket just out of the dryer being wrapped around his shoulders. Remi just… just wanted to...- He leaned forward, expecting the sensation of Craig’s soft lips to meet his after his eyelids fluttered closed, but instead he was met with- Ugh. Well, definitely not his lips. 

 

Craig had taken a step back and lifted a hand to squish against Remi’s face, pushing him away. “No, no, no,” Craig said with a playful chuckle. Remi’s eyes opened and glared at him bitterly. Not genuinely angry, of course, but still a bonafide “eats shit” grimace. “Not until you get all my chores done, bro. That’s the deal. When you get home, I’ll be all over you.”

 

Rolling his eyes so hard he may have pulled a muscle, Remi promptly responded, “Jeez, you just pulled a classic dad move on another dad. You know that right?” He quirked a brow at his beefy boyfriend, who squinted at him as if to visually ask for Remi to explain himself. “Like… You pulled the whole “you don’t get what you want until your chores are done” schtick. I mean, with kids it’s usually video games or phones, and with us it’s kisses and cuddles, but like… Similar concept.”

 

“Huh,” Was all that came out of Craig’s mouth at first. There was a pause, a moment of uncomfortable silence, but soon enough he was speaking again. “I mean, you’re not totally wrong. I wouldn’t say I’m scolding or punishing you the way dads to do kids, but..”

He was rudely interrupted by a groan. “Don’t think about it too hard, bro. You’re gonna strain your brain. I said it was like a similar concept, not the exact situation.” He heard Craig draw in a breath so he could get his next mouthful of words out. “...Hold up, sugar,” Remi said, sticking out a finger and pressing it to Craig’s lips as a gesture for him to keep his mouth closed. “We don’t gotta argue about this. How about… I go ahead and get the chores started, and you go.. Uh… make a milkshake- with protein powder in it- and go watch a movie?” 

 

Craig nodded, and at that Remi pulled his finger away from the man’s lips. With a bright smile, perhaps a little suspiciously enthusiastic, Remi leaned in to give Craig a kiss. His boyfriend gladly accepted it, interlocking their lips for only a few heavenly moments before Remi pulled away again. “...Okay, baby, I’ll see you later,” Remi said quietly, running the back of his hand carefully along Craig’s jawline. Craig smiled sweetly, seemingly melting under the touch of his partner’s skin. 

 

“Catch you later, hun,” he responded, throwing in a cheeky little wink at the end. Oh… my god. Craig just decided to use a romantic nickname instead of his usual default of bro-related pet names. Granted, it was a very minor affectionate term and it wasn’t as endearing as Remi’s often were, but regardless- it was what it was. Clear acknowledgement of his romantic bond with Remi. Man, that made Remi’s heart so damn happy… Maybe he was overthinking it, but it just made him feel so special when Craig called him those certain nicknames that only him, his big ol’ hunk of boyfriend, got the honor of being called. If one day Craig wanted to call someone else those things, that was okay, too, but… Ah, it was hard for Remi to capture what he was feeling. In essence, he just knew that being called terms of romantic endearment by Craig meant you were a whole different breed of special to him.

 

Mustering enough strength not to kiss Craig again, and maybe push him back onto the couch, Remi turned away and headed for the front door. On the way out, he snatched his car keys off the counter, and the last thing Craig heard was a familiar metallic jingling followed by the slam of a door. Craig let out a long sigh as he heard Remi’s footsteps fall silent and the sound of the car engine hum in the distance. He stretched his arms over his head before turning to the kitchen and heading to his cabinets. He began arranging the ingredients he needed for a milkshake fit for a king- peanut butter, chocolate ice cream, banana slices, protein power, and… Ah, fuck it, he pulled out some chocolate milk to throw in there too. If he was gonna go all out, he was gonna go  _ all _ out. Balls deep in this damn milkshake. 

 

Once he got his extra classy dessert all ready to consume, he flopped down on his couch and grabbed the TV remote off the coffee table. He switched the television onto a cheesy romantic comedy- something light and easy to focus on. He drew in a nice, long breath to calm his nerves, and started to fill up on sugary, chocolatey goodness. The thought of Remi, of all his daily expectations, still floated around in his head… But, he was determined to try and follow Remi’s advice. He tried his best to push that into the background. Before he got too settled in, though, he snatched his phone off the table and shot Remi a text of all the things he had to get done. 

As soon as he pulled up a red light, Remi clicked his home screen to wake up his phone and glanced at Craig’s text. 

 

“TEXT: OK bro!!!!!!! Make sure u go to the grocery store. We need milk, bread, eggs, kale, broccoli, apples, oats... “ The list of food products seemed to go on for-fucking-ever before Craig got to the next task. “Then u gotta go to the dry cleaners, I have some work clothes u gotta pick up. Then run by Robert’s and ask him abt the knife thing. He’ll know what ur talking about. And don’t worry- im not stabbing anyone. It’s for future camping adventures ;)” 

 

Future camping adventures… Well, that proposition sure got Remi excited. Considering how their first camping excursion went, and all those after it, one of the things he most looked forward to with Craig was wandering out into the wilderness with him. Ah, yes, lots of swimming in small ponds, eating s’mores, and making out in a single sleeping bag. In fact, after that first time, they didn’t even bother to bring two sleeping bags. Knowing how much he loved being in the outdoors with Craig, he hoped one day they might die by bear mauling, holding hands and staring soulfully into one another’s eyes as it devours their intestines. ...Eh, okay, maybe he didn’t actually hope for that, but somewhere in his head it made a pretty cool dramatic fantasy. 

 

The excitement of a hot dude and the great outdoors aside, Remi slipped his phone back into the pocket of his jeans and focused his eyes back onto the road. Just as he did, the light flashed green and he headed off to his first task. He concluded in his head that’d do the grocery shopping last, given that he wouldn’t want all those food products sitting in a hot car while he was running the other errands. Craig wouldn’t exactly be happy if he promised he’d do all of his chores only to come home with spoiled milk. 

 

First, Remi headed in the direction of the dry cleaner’s- that was not only the closest but it was hypothetically the simplest task to complete. The only weird thing was… When did Craig ever wear clothes fancy enough to need dry cleaning? Eh, Remi wouldn’t strain himself thinking about it. It probably had something to do with work, like nice suits or shirts for business meetings and all that. It was still kinda weird for Remi to imagine Craig in a serious work setting- he was so used to seeing his boyfriend when he was in “play” mode rather than “work” mode. Of course, Remi had seem him in his more serious moods considering they’d been together for a whole two years, but… It just wasn’t frequent. Sometimes Remi loosely forgot that that side of him existed, especially considering Craig didn’t enjoy thinking nor talking about work when he was at home. Home time was family time. 

 

While lost in his train of thought, Remi drove himself seemingly on auto-pilot to the dry cleaner’s, which was nestled among several other small shops. On one side of it was an old, old furniture store, and on the other side was a nail salon. It baffled Remi that both of these places were still in business, he rarely saw anyone go in or out. In fact, as he glanced behind him after having exited his car, he noticed that the parking lot was almost entirely empty save for three, maybe four cars. Huh. Slow day. Come to think of it, the only real memory Remi had about this tiny pocket of town was coming to the nail salon with Craig and the twins for their birthday… Ah, that was a fun and yet horribly awkward day. Remi and Craig decided to get each other’s favorite color on their nails- Blue for Remi and purple for Craig.

 

Remi instinctively glanced down at his nails, thusly noticing that there were still tiny flecks of blue in the corners. He sighed… He sorta wanted to go out and do something like that again; just have a relaxing family day. He loved feeling accepted by Craig’s kids, and feeling like he was… was… Well, actually their dad. It made his heart swell so big he was worried it might burst in his chest. He often wondered if one day he’d be more than just their dad’s boyfriend, if he’d be legitimate family, if he’d be Craig’s... - 

 

Never mind. Remi needed to focus on the task at hand, maybe that was a train of thought for another time. He reoriented his focus and directed his eyes to the door ahead of him. He pressed a heavy hand to the glass, shoving it open and hearing the resounding chime of a bell as he did so. He stepped into the small, dimly lit shop and surveyed the interior for some kind of clerk. He didn’t see anyone yet, but he did hear a man shout from another room that he would be there momentarily. Remi stopped in front of the counter and bided him time.

 

This place was, admittedly, kinda eerie. Remi wasn’t an easily scared person, and this place wasn’t exactly  _ scary, _ but it was a little creepy. Already having mentioned that it wasn’t very brightly lit in here, the other aspect that added to the general discomfort was the unnatural, pure white of the buzzing lights in the ceiling. They cast a soft glow of ivory color along the white-black tiled floors, complemented in an awful way by how the lights flickered every now and again. But, of course, white lights were common- duh- but for some reason their placement in this mute-colored shop was incredibly unnerving. It felt… akin to a doctor’s office. Huh. It’s sort of a doctor’s office for clothes. 

 

Before Remi could really entertain that thought regarding this being a medical facility for pants, a very short man with balding hair popped out from behind a door at the back of the lobby. He waved at Remi and offered him a kind smile, stepping right up to the counter and already setting a hand on the mouse by his computer. “Hello, welcome in! Can I get a last name so I can grab your items?” He requested, getting right down to business other than his courteous welcome. 

 

Remi smiled back modestly. “Cahn,” he responded shortly. The small man nodded and focused his eyes on his computer screen, clicking and typing. 

 

“Fantastic, Mr. Cahn!” Oh… Oops, apparently this guy didn’t remember what Craig looked like, because Remi was almost certain Craig had come by to get his clothes himself at some point. It was no big deal, though, he’d figure it out on his own that Remi was, in fact, just Craig’s big boyfriend. “Your total comes out to $50.” Whoa, whoa, is that not a little high for dry cleaning? Remi had a few questions, but he decided to push that off to the corner of his mind for now. He trusted Craig and his choices most of the time, so he didn’t bother worrying about it regardless. It was probably just a pretty sizable order. 

  
  


One successful transaction and a few minutes of waiting later, Remi was walking out of the dry cleaner’s with two pieces of clothing, which he assumed to be either shirts or full suits, veiled with thin black plastic. He hung them up in the backseat by their coat hangers and slid back into the front seat. Alright… Onto the next task.

 

Wait. Fuck, what was the next task again? Remi was determined to figure it out on his own and not dare glance at the texts Craig had sent him. He furrowed his brows and closed his eyes, getting into The Zone as he racked his brains for the answer he needed. It took him a solid 30 seconds before…- Oh! He had to go to Robert’s house! There we go, Remi knew he could remember what he needed to if he tried hard enough. Now with a little surge of pride coursing through his veins, Remi headed off back to the cul-de-sac to meet up with gool ol’ Mr. Small. 

 

Once he arrived, he spotted Robert’s truck in the driveway, which confirmed that he was actually home. Remi still wasn’t certain where Robert would disappear to all day, but sometimes he found that maybe he didn’t want to know. Robert was an awfully mysterious man, and some part of him preferred to keep it that way. He had some awful paranoia that Robert was actually a serial killer or something to that effect. Ah, if only he weren’t so naive and knew how actually harmless his neighbor was. The chilling thought of where Robert goes all day aside, Remi pulled his car up against the curb and put it in park. 

 

Walking up to Robert’s front door, he already felt an awful nervousness welling up in his gut. Remi and Robert had moved on front their little dispute at Amanda’s graduation party, regarding to two of them being nothing more than fuck buddies, but… Things were still just a little difficult. Remi always felt like Robert was hiding something, like there really were feeling involved on his end and he was just repressing them. Now, that could very likely just be wishful thinking, but Remi liked to consider himself a pretty perceptive and realistic person. In addition to that, he’d had plenty of emotionless sexual partners throughout his life. He knew what a dynamic like that felt like. Fucking without feelings attached defined basically his entire time in college, actually. That, and Remi pulled the exact same shit Robert pulled on him- using someone for just their body and leaving the emotions part ambiguous until you’re pulling the rug out from under them.

 

Now, he regretted his decisions in doing that and he’d grown out of his habit of pulling that kind of shit, but the point was that he knew how that worked. He was familiar with that strategy, and you better believe it hurt like hell to have his same trick pulled on him. Karma is a real bitch, isn’t she? He knew he didn’t do that to people anymore, but he still.. Somewhere, deep down, recognized that maybe he still needed to pay the consequences for his actions. All that aside, the gist of this train of thought was that his friendship with Robert felt rocky because he felt like there was something there, hiding below the surface. 

 

Being the persistent man he was, Remi hoped one day he’d uncover whatever emotion Robert kept trying to swallow back. Every time Remi spent time with Robert, he felt drawn to him- like there was a lot more in common about them than he let on. They came from similar pasts, and fought similar demons. Only.. Robert would never let him get close enough to confirm his suspicions. Let’s establish now that, no, that doesn’t mean he would cheat on Craig to figure out Robert’s feelings. Remi was a functional adult who’d gone through all that sort of drama one too many times to do it again; he wasn’t a naive young adult anymore. He’d present the information to Craig and propose the option of a polyamorous relationship, in which Remi engages his already acknowledged feelings for Craig while also pursuing the possible romantic attraction between him and Robert. Because, you know, that’s what competent adults  _ do. _

 

Okay, emotions aside, it was time to summon the leather-jacket wearing beast from his lair. Remi knocked at his front door several times and awaited a response. He ended up waiting out there for what he suspected was a whole five goddamn minutes before Robert yanked the door open, brows knitted and lips tightened into one hell of a grimace. He held the door opened only about a quarter of the way, so that Remi could really only see the broad-framed man standing in the doorway. Oh, that was almost certainly an indicator that Robert’s house was a raging mess right now.

 

“Need something, Garza?” He grumbled, staring him down with eyes that resembled a dark amber fire. Well, looked like somebody wasn’t in a good mood… Also, what was up with him pulling Remi’s last name? What was he, a football coach? He let it slide and decided not to start his arguement over something so petty. 

 

Drawing in a deep breath, internally telling himself to keep his composure, Remi spoke up. “Yeah, actually I do need somethin’- Craig said to… uh… ask you about a _ knife thing. _ ” At first, Robert just quirked a brow and Remi swore he heard some kind of low growl booming in the other man’s chest. He glared at the man standing at his door, looking him up and down as if he was sizing him up. The look in his eyes was piercing, unreadable… Remi felt his stomach turn with anxiety. He got a sudden inkling. Was Robert about to start a knife fight with him? Is that was this really was, an elaborate scheme just to kill Remi? Wait.. Wait, that meant Craig was in on it the whole time. He never loved Remi, he was just a means to an end, a pawn, a-

 

“Oh, yeah. I remember. Craig wanted me to restore an old knife for him.” Robert snapped Remi out of his ridiculous, irrational thoughts. With hazy eyes coming back into the realm of reality, Robert gave him a modest half-smile and stepped to the side, opening the door wider. “C’mon. I’ll grab what you need, take a seat on the couch if you want.” 

 

Remi let out a sigh that he hoped Robert didn’t hear. “Cool, okay. I- wait, you restore knives?” He asked as he stepped through the door, which Robert closed once he was all the way inside. Robert was already headed down the hallway to his bedroom, but glanced over his shoulder to speak to Remi.

 

“Yep. Don’t worry about it, it’s just a hobby of mine. Not like I plan on making cool knives and then gutting people with them or anything.” Robert stopped in the middle of the hallway, knowing perfectly well that he’d catch Remi off guard. “...Or do I?” Well, there he goes again with that morbid sense of humor. Remi was not only used to it, but on occasion he’d reciprocate that same brand of unsettling comedy with him.

 

Rolling his eyes, Remi plopped himself down on Robert’s couch. Which- only had a little bit of free space that wasn’t covered by unfolded laundry or empty bottles. Remi wouldn’t expect anything less from Robert. At the very least, Robert wasn’t dirty anymore- he was just messy. “Don’t reveal too much of your plans, Mr. Small… I-  _ the government _ \- might already be onto ya,” he responded with a warm chuckle. Robert snickered right back and proceeded on his way to his bedroom. 

 

Remi was left waiting on the couch for a few minutes, all the while his inability to sit still for more than a solid 30 seconds kicked in. Remi was, without a doubt, the most tactile person he knew. He had to touch everything, and his main method of communication happened to be through touch. Even in school, the more hands-on projects were the things he learned the most efficiently from. Without taking the time to consider his actions before he carried them out, he picked up the nearest article of clothing sitting next to Remi on the couch. He unfolded it in his lap, pinching the soft fabric between his fingers. His brows furrowed as he surveyed its seams, its deep wrinkles, its faded color… 

 

Oh! Oh, he knew what it was. He wasn’t sure why it took him more than a few seconds to figure it out, but it was just a pair of boxers. They were an ashy gray color with a black waistband, accented by a little red line running along the-  _ wait. Wait, hold up.  _ Remi, why are you holding this man’s underwear in your hands? Realizing the stupid error he made, he tossed the piece of clothing to the other side of the couch and pressed his hands in his lap. He was going to keep his fingers tightly laced together now, like a good boy in church. No touching the undergarments of his friends. No sir.

 

Only a few uncomfortable minutes later, Robert came back through the hallway into the living room with a small box held in one hand. It was black, sleek, and didn’t seem to have any kind of lettering or labels on it. Before Remi could speak up and ask any questions, Robert was pushing the small box against his chest as a gesture for him to take it. Remi did so, grasping and bringing it into his lap. His fingers ran against the seams of the box, sparking with the temptation to open it.

 

“Can I-”

 

“Yeah, you can open it. Don’t be stupid, Remi. Did you think I was going to sell you a knife without actually proving the knife is in the box?” He said bitterly, quirking an accusing eyebrow at the larger man sitting on his couch. Remi rolled his eyes and let out an audible scoff, seemingly offended by Robert’s reaction to him trying to be polite. Jeez, he did all this work to try and be a better person with Craig, and then he came across Robert and it was like all of that went out the window. Robert didn’t play nice, and thusly he didn’t like it when people tried to play nice with him. Some part of Remi told him to keep his composure and be a good boy, but… Sometimes, human nature gets the best of you.

 

Flipping open the top of the box, Remi grimaced at his friend. “Call me stupid again and maybe I’ll use this knife to cut  _ you _ . Y’know… Testing out if it works right n’ all that,” he responded with a short snicker. Remi’s eyes directed down at his lap as he picked the knife up into his hands. The material was warm, as if it’d been touched recently, and it was a smooth dark blue color around the hilt. The blade, as soon as Remi snapped it out of its folded position, was solid black. Sleek. Professional-looking. Was this actually for camping, or was Craig some kind of secret agent that carried around sexy knives? Who knows. With a body like that, he could easily be in a James Bond movie. 

 

“Kinky,” Robert responded with a sarcastic purr in his tone. Remi’s violet eyes immediately shot back up at him, obviously concerned and maybe a little flustered by his response. He was staring at him for a few seconds, as if he was trying to assess if Robert was actually joking or not. Robert displayed a proud smirk as he noticed the light dusting of fuchsia color on Remi’s cheeks. Aw, somebody wasn’t expecting a response like that. 

 

Remi got it through his thick skull that Robert was just playing with him and proceeded to look back down at the knife, electing to ignore that comment all together. Best to just not say anything, let it go and pretend it didn’t happen. He just-... Ah, the struggles of a closeted polyamorous man with a shameless knife kink. 

 

After playing with the knife in his hands for a bit longer, he glanced back up at Robert. “Cool knife. I like it,” he said bluntly. Robert remained silent, only acknowledging Remi’s words with a nod. Remi felt his chest tighten, as if someone was pushing down on his sternum. Shit. Did he make things awkward? He really hoped he didn’t make things awkward. He swallowed back the nervousness in his throat and carefully folded the knife back into a closed position, then placed it back in its box. “So… Did Craig already pay, or do I gotta..-”

 

“It was a commission, so he paid me before I started,” Robert informed him. “Which means you’re just here for pick-up.”

 

“Oh! Cool, cool. That makes things a lot easier. So-”

 

“Which also means you can leave.” 

 

Oh, oh well okay. It seems that Remi had, in fact, made things awkward with their earlier interaction. That was unfortunate, and made Remi feel not only embarrassed but a tad guilty. Either way, now wasn’t the time to talk things up with Robert and address the weird sexual tension lingering between the two of them. If he ever did address that issue, which at some point he wanted it, it would be something he would discuss with Craig beforehand nevertheless. Craig was his partner, he was committed to him, and nothing would change that. Fortunately, Remi had learned that you don’t have to live in a world where you limit yourself to loving one person. But… That was all a conversation best had another time. Right now, Remi had to be on his way to the grocery store and then get home to his loving boyfriend. 

 

Remi pulled himself up off the couch with the knife box in-hand. “Thanks, buddy. Hit me up some time, okay?” He said, offering a kind smile in some effort to lighten the mood of the situation. Robert seemed to only nod in the slightest bit and give him a very disconcerting grunt. Hopefully that was grunt of reluctant, but that was yet to be seen. Avoiding eye contact immediately after those words left his mouth, Remi headed his way to the door and slipped out without another word.

 

Just before he closed the door behind him, he impulsively glanced over his shoulder. He wasn’t sure what compelled him to do that, perhaps it was just a knee-jerk reaction. The timing… Oh, the timing made him want to hit his head on a wall. His eyes connected with Robert’s for just a moment as the man was turning away from the couch to head back to his bedroom. Remi quickly looked away and proceeded to slam the door shut behind him. Fuck. Way to make that even more awkward. 

 

Sighing and gently smacking his forehead with his free hand, Remi made his way to his car. “Awesome, great job. You’re so good at keeping friends.  _ Fuck _ ,” he murmured bitterly to himself as he squeezed back into the driver’s seat. He set the knife box in the seat beside him and proceeded to… ignore the idea of getting buckled up. He was grumpy, and grumpy Remi makes questionable choices. When he was younger, he make much more risky choices, such as getting shitface drunk and getting into fights. However, nowadays, with a happy life, partner, and kids… He tried not to let himself be so daring. He’d learned to control his urges while he still had Amanda at home. 

 

Alright, no dwelling on this situation. It was time to go grocery shopping.

 

The trip to the local Walmart was only a five minute drive from Robert’s house, and that was more or less a blessing. Definitely more, actually. He would have gotten even more bitter just driving alone with his thoughts for anything more than about seven minutes. After he parked the car as close to the entrance of the store as he could, he walked up to the entrance all the while twirling his keys around his finger. This was quite entertaining, and kept his hand busy, but as soon as the automatic doors slid open it occurred to him that maybe twirling keys inside of a Walmart wasn’t a good idea.

 

He pocketed the keys and instead pulled out his phone. He always needed to have  _ something _ in his hands-- or at the very least something to do  _ with _ his hands. Time to look back at the messages Craig sent regarding what he needed to grab at the store, because lord knows he didn’t remember that all on his own. With one hand on his phone and eyes glancing back and forth between the screen and the store, Remi pulled out a shopping cart with the other hand and leaned both elbows on the the push-bar to keep it steady. 

 

Heading off toward the produce aisle, because he already knew Craig wanted a lot of fruits and veggies just from knowing the man, he noticed he had a few new notifications from Craig… His brows furrowed. Huh. Hopefully it was just him gushing about how much he loved a TV show or a certain actor, but he had a fear in the back of his mind that it was going to be a message entailing Craig’s nervousness around being left home alone. Remi’s stomach twisted with a touch of anxiety as he clicked on the icon that welcomed him into his messages. He just, oh man, he just wanted so badly for Craig to learn to give himself breaks. He’d made so much progress in the last two years, he--

 

Oh. Oh, well, it seemed that Remi had really jumped the gun with the assumptions he was making. It seemed that being home alone had struck Craig with a terrible sense of boredom, and he couldn’t just lie around and watch television all day. Craig was far too active, far too attached to having constant attention. But… Rather than obsessing over the fact that he wasn’t doing any of his chores, he went and found something else to do. Something that, in Remi’s opinion, was not only incredibly productive but was a goddamn blessing.

 

TEXT [CRAIG]: Hey baby!!!!! I wanted to say thx again for taking all of my errands again.

TEXT [CRAIG]: And I know what you like. So, I snapped a few pics for you. As a token of appreciation! Careful not to open them in public though.

TEXT [CRAIG]: Enjoy ;)

 

The time stamp indicated that there was about a five minute gap.

 

TEXT [CRAIG]: Seriously bro, be careful with these. I haven’t sent pics like this since college. These are some hot items. 

 

Yeah, Craig definitely had that last part right- these were some hot items. Just below that string of messages were two of the most goddamn lovely images he’d seen in his life. It was an absolute shame there were only two, but Remi could make do and study the details of Craig’s body seemingly forever. Remi started a walk a whole lot slower through the produce aisle, making sure to glance around him every few seconds to make sure no one was close enough to look over his shoulder. Right now, luckily, the store wasn’t busy. There was only one other person in this section, and they were busy bagging radishes.

 

He let out a sigh and looked back down at his phone. He clicked on the first image, bringing it up feel-screen. This one… This one was really good. Of course, everything about Craig was really good, but this was- this was just special. It was simple, though. Just him lying on his stomach, taking a picture over his shoulder to get a good view of his stark naked ass. He had a just-barely noticeable tan line from the few times he wore shorts when he went out running, and dear God Remi thought that was the cutest thing he’d ever seen. Other than the comedic change in skin tone, there was another reason Remi was admiring his boyfriend’s butt. 

 

It was just a really, really good butt. It had the most impressive curvature, an absolutely wonderful arch. It was what most people would define a “bubble butt.” Man, it was in this moment that Remi was so fuckin’ proud that he was the only person that got to get up in that fine ass. He felt his fingers twitch just the slightest bit as the thought of grabbing each cheek with in his palms floated through his head. God, the way it was such a good balance of soft fatty tissue on top of muscle was just so…

 

Okay. Okay time to focus on something else before his thoughts went too far. He shoved his phone back into his pocket with shaky hands, then went on to grab a small baggy to start grabbing some apples. Yes. Granny Smith apples, the superior apple. Tart, crisp, but still with a hint of sweetness to balance it all out. Fantastic in pies- wonderful in the form of baked apples. Great with cinnamon and sugar. Hell, as Remi found out through Craig, they’re even good thinly sliced and tossed into salads. Uh… They were also good to just eat raw. Apple a day keeps the doctor away, and all that.

 

Remi picked up the last apple he needed in his hands, and just as its shiny green skin touched the edge of the bag- his phone jolted to life in his phone with a buzz and the apple dropped out of his palm. “Fuck!” He snapped, trying his best to catch the fruit before it hit the ground, but no dice. It hit the floor with a small thud, and Remi swore he could feel it in his damn chest that he had bruised that apple. Was he feeling empathy for food just now? Incredible. Well, now he had to buy it. He couldn’t just leave a nasty, bruised apple on the display, that was such a dick move. He only did that kind of thing in college. 

 

Sighing with defeat, Remi swiped the apple off the floor and shoved it into the bag beside all of its fruity brothers. You’re the weak link now, fallen apple. Get used to it. They’ll eat you up out there, you don’t stand a chance. He tied the end of the plastic bag and set it down in his cart, but didn’t start to leave just yet. Now, he had to check his phone and see who caused him to hurt that innocent, youthful apple. He’d develop a grudge on them-- one day he would exact revenge on the behalf of that Granny Smith--

 

Fuck, it was Craig. Never mind. Craig was the king of all apples, and he decided the fate of his people. If that apple was intended to be hurt, then so be it.

 

Actually, Remi, what the hell are you going on about? You dropped an apple on the floor because your boyfriend texted you and scared you. Get over yourself, dude. He shook himself out of his exaggerated thoughts and unlocked his phone with the pad of his thumb. He navigated to the messaging system, and… Oh, joy. Oh, fantastic, wonderful, and more. Craig didn’t send him any kind of text, just another picture. This boy really knew how to turn Remi’s face red. 

 

This new image Craig had sent to his lover’s phone was of him lying on his back, thighs spread wide apart and hips lifting upward toward his hands as he wrapped one hand around his noticeably hard cock. Remi bit his lip and admired Craig’s body… The definition in his stomach, his thighs, and the way you could see a vein or two in his strong arms. God, you could just tell from the way he was holding himself that he was trembling. His muscles were so tense, held so tightly. The thought whirred around Remi’s head about how turned on he must be, and what he’s gotta be thinking about to’ve done this to himself. 

 

He didn’t intend to be a little bit of narcissist, but he wondered if it was  _ him _ that Craig was thinking of. Who the hell else would he be getting off to? Hey, maybe that’s not narcissistic at all, come to think of it- especially considering Remi knew for a fact that Craig found him attractive. And had plenty of nudes he’d sent in the past saved on his phone. Craig had a whole goddamn photo album of Remi flaunting the blessed, broad-framed body he’s got. But, but, okay, that’s enough thinking about that. Considering the idea that Craig was lying in bed fantasizing about Remi fucking him into the mattress was a little too much for being in the middle of a grocery store.

 

Who was he kidding? The pictures he was looking at were already too much. Especially… Oh man, Remi couldn’t help but focus on Craig’s body again. He had no way of feeling it, obviously, but he couldn’t help but think about how warm and supple that man’s skin was. It’d feel like heaven under his hands, and he would absolutely adore to hear Craig moan as he gripped tight to his hip bones, digging his fingernails into him. Craig’s skin was always soft, of course, but there was certain times his shorter counterpart was like a fucking heater. Remi loved it; there were few things in the world more comforting than Craig’s body heat. 

 

An awfully deep breath left Remi’s mouth, and with it a swarm of butterflies fluttered around his stomach. That… That was a cue for him to put his phone back in his pocket before his jeans got a little tight. With a reddish color settling on his cheeks and a starstruck look in his eyes, he slid his phone away and put his hands back onto the cart. Fuck. They were shaking. Oh no, this wasn’t an ideal situation to be in.

 

He had half a mind to just head on home now so he didn’t have to deal with the possibility of being horribly embarrassed, but… It occurred to him that if he didn’t get done the three simple tasks Craig asked him to, he wasn’t getting to hit jack shit. In addition to that, Remi was a stubborn bastard, not a quitter, _ and  _ there were already some items in his cart. He had to finish this up, and then he could go home. 

 

God, staying here was going to be a real pain in the ass, though. Just… Knowing that Craig was at home, squirming and whimpering as he played with himself, breaths getting more rapid and cheeks flushing a fuchsia c-- No. No, no. He had to stop thinking about that because it was a tad ridiculous how easily Craig got him riled up. Remi shook his boyfriend out of his head for now, then redirected his attention to the produce aisle. His brows furrowed as he glared at all the vegetables and fruits. Alright, what next? Ah, yes, veggies. Carrots, broccoli, and shit like that. 

 

It pained him to have to do it, but he had to pull his phone back out of his pocket and scroll up his messages with Craig so he could glance back at the grocery list he sent. He felt a concerning warmth in his gut as he rushed past all the nudes in his inbox. Just… just ignore them… He took a deep breath and shoved his phone back in his pocket as soon as he read the information he needed. Okay. Don’t think about Craig’s stellar ass.

 

He tried to make as quick work of collecting produce as he could, ignoring his shaky hands all the while. Luckily, he didn’t drop anything else, but he was getting progressively more frustrated with his trembling. It was a constant goddamn reminder that Craig had a terribly large effect on him, and that man’s beauty alone could flip his day upside down. Craig was a force to be reckoned with, that was for sure. It wasn’t even just Remi who he had an effect on- anybody who passed Craig on the streets ended up giving distracted looking him over. 

 

Well.. Granted, Remi did too, but he was almost positive that was mostly because of how big he was. Big as in tall, not-- You get it. All that aside, he finished up getting all the items from this section that he needed, and he headed off to a different part of the store. As most dads do, he was going to slowly go up and down each aisle, glancing along the shelves as he did so and grabbing the things he needed as he spotted them. He did this task mindlessly, almost like it was out of muscle memory. He’d gone to this same grocery store, got all the same things, so many times. Most of the time, he had Craig and the kids with him too, but he’d gotten so into the rhythm of things that he could handle it all on his own. 

 

Albeit, he did still need Craig to send him a shopping list, though. His memory wasn’t  _ that _ good yet. All that aside, as the minutes passed Remi had combed through three or four aisles. The cart was about halfway full with items now, and to his surprise, he didn’t hear any more messages pop up on his phone. That was… a blessing. As badly as he wanted to look at Craig’s stunning body while he shoved a hand down his pants, he knew he had to focus on getting his errands done right now. 

 

He was onto the carbs part of Craig’s shopping list, which was also known as his favorite part. He snagged a box of Cheerios off the shelves, then some oatmeal, and after that he made a point to pick up some Froot loops for himself. A man’s gotta treat himself every now and then- and he knew Craig would eat some of them, too. No one can resist the sweet touch of that blue toucan. Once all three of those items were in the cart, he had to get into the next aisle so he could grab some rice. Brown rice, to be specific, because apparently there’s something wrong with white rice. Remi never bothered to learn what that was, he just took Craig’s word for it.

 

But… Of course, his luck had to run dry at some point. He felt the vibration of his phone against his thigh, and let out a sigh before he was even aware it was on his lips. “C’mon, don’t look at it…” Remi murmured to himself, continuing to stroll along the aisle, swiping items into the cart as he went along. Just to his misfortune, the phone buzzed again. And again. Jesus, Craig, how many naughty selfies are you going to take today?

 

Fine, Remi had to admit his sins. He was weak to the forces of gorgeous men, and they had power over his mortal soul. Try as he might, he knew he was going to crumble under the pressure eventually. Why waste his time pushing off the inevitable/ He pulled his phone out of his pocket and unlocked it, quickly bringing up the messenger client. Without realizing it, he’d stopped in the middle of the aisle with his eyes wide and face flushing red. The one hand still on the cart was gripping tighter… So much so that his knuckles started to turn white. Oh, how he wanted his hand wrapping around Craig’s waist, or his wrist, perhaps his hip, or- maybe even his throat. 

 

The three most recent images from Craig were absolutely golden. The first was him standing in front of the full-body mirror on their closet door, posing and flexing his stomach in a way that accentuated his abs. The second was a similar angle, only he was turned around and taking a picture of his shoulder. Remi knew he intended that image for capturing his fine ass, but he found himself getting distracted by that gorgeously sculpted back. Well- the butt was nice too, and he did check that out too. Don’t be mistaken. The last image was a bit different than the first two, it was…

 

Oh, jeez. Remi considered maybe he should put his phone away at that moment, concerned by the blood rushing to the south end of his body, but he couldn’t seem to look away. Craig was perched on his knees, snapping an absolutely breathtaking angle of him showing off his body as he sunk himself down on a girthy pink dildo. Remi instinctively bit his lip, trying his hardest to ignore how badly he wanted to buried in that fine ass. 

 

You know, come to think of it, maybe he should just go home.

 

**Author's Note:**

> Like I said in the summary, I could do more chapters for this, but it all depends on how well this first chapter goes. Thank you for reading!! <3


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